Help Your Child Make Friends at School

“I don’t have any friends.” No parent wants to hear it, but for students who are new to school, making friends can be tough. Whether every kid is new, such as a typical kindergarten classroom, or your child is the “new kid,” your child’s spirit may suffer during the first days of school. Help make the transition to a new school better by encouraging your child to make friends with any of these ideas:

• Role playing. Using imaginative play or role playing, practice how to make polite conversation with your daughter’s peers. Encourage her to make eye contact, use a natural smile, and provide honest compliments, such as “I like your artwork.” Kids can also be encouraged to volunteer to help their peers when in need. Use role playing often to help your daughter practice these skills. Playing again tomorrow or next week will allow you to observe her improvements.
• Playdates. Arrange occasional after school or weekend playdates with classmates. Keep these playdates small, with one or two friends, so that your son is able to connect with individual kids. Encourage specific play that is a common interest. For example, if both kids love art, pull out some paper and paints. And keep the playdates short (especially with new playmates). One to two hours is enough time for children to play without losing interest.
• Lead by example. Demonstrate kindness and polite conversation when you are in public. Use the same techniques that you encourage your child to use during role playing when talking to the store clerk or your neighbors. Talk with your son after your interaction about what you’ve done. Additionally, you can invite over your own friends with children and have a double playdate.
• Enlist the support of your child’s classroom teacher. Teachers want to build a community where every child feels secure in the classroom. Your daughter’s classroom teacher may know just the right peer to be her friend and can set up this introduction.
• Don’t over do it. Every child is different. Keep talking with your son about his experiences at school, but don’t put too much pressure into friendship. If your child is content without close friends, let it be for the time being.
• Teach empathy. Developing emotional intelligence and empathy from a young age supports kids both in and out of the classroom. Check back next week for tips on teaching empathy.