If you’ve ever led a game with kids, you might dread the phrase “you’re out.” Kids can respond defensively, be argumentative, in tears, they can accept the decision, or respond differently. But what if instead of saying, “you’re out,” everyone around told that student “good try”? How would the student who was less successful feel?
Positive language can make an incredible difference in supporting healthy school culture and interpersonal relationships. It encourages kids to feel safe and included at school.
Adults and student leaders can model this positive language and behavior and embed it into games.
Positive communication engages students and fosters healthy behaviors both in and out of the classroom. When students use positive language, these tools become part of their normal vocabulary throughout their entire school experience.
The strategy for making positive communication the norm is not linear. It involves continuously reinforcing behaviors with different groups throughout the year.
To implement positive communication, adults and student leaders should:
- Set expectations early and often
- Promote and reinforce the use of positive communication during play
What you can try this week:
Set expectations early and often
- Make student leaders role models for positive behavior. Meet with them to set goals, such as using 5 supportive phrases/compliments each day.
- Open games or recess by demonstrating how students can communicate positively when a fellow student gets ‘out’ of a game.
- Close games or recess by affirming students who were using positive language.
Promote or reinforce positive communication
- Have the group of students waiting to play repeat a positive cheer when a player gets out of the game. Students can even make up their own supportive cheers before the start of a game!
- Join in and play with the kids and encourage other adults to do so too. The more consistent all role models are using this language, the more kids will pick up on these behaviors.